Life

What Is Your Soul’s Purpose?

Do you know what your true purpose is? I mean, really truly know. How many of you get up everyday and are totally thrilled with what you’re doing with your life? You can’t wait to wake up, sleeping is basically keeping you from doing what you love to do. The reason I ask is because I’ve never felt that way… completely. Which is a big reason why I absolutely love, love, love hearing peoples stories. I mean, love it. Could listen to them all day long. Literally. It’s also another reason why I soooo love reading all of your blogs! image

It’s not that I haven’t enjoyed doing certain things in my life. I’ve just never had that true feeling of pure contentment of loving what I’m doing with my life. I’m speaking from a career standpoint of fulfillment. I have always been envious of peers and friends who knew exactly what they wanted to do with their life essentially since they were a child growing up. They seemed to have their life map all worked out at such a young age and then continued on the required path to get there. I remember friends saying they were going to be a fireman, accountant or a nurse and that’s exactly what they ended up being. How the hell? I was fascinated and would try desperately to be a part of that group. The group who always just knew what they were meant to do. I never wanted to be a nurse or an accountant. Boring. No offence to all of the nurses and accountants out there! You guys rock! It just wasn’t for me. image

I grew up wanting to be a singer. Yep, a singer. I know, right. Odd ball. I always alternated between wanting to be a singer/entertainer, author (like Daniel Steele) or an actress on a soap opera (at 12 I decided I’d be on All My Children) It was the only one we were able to watch on the one channel we had. Small town girl here.

Like who wants to be a damn singer/entertainer for real? Okay, wait a second… let me answer that. In this reality fame generation EVERYONE and their dog wants to be a singer or entertainer. Hence why millions and millions of people audition for American Idol type tv shows. But let me just remind you, when I was growing up no one I knew ever said ‘I want to be singer, screw college!’ Not one person. I grew up in a small town in Ontario. No traffic lights small town, so to dream that big was unheard of and frankly was laughed off as being a silly unattainable idea. Small town mentality?

I used to perform for family gatherings and neighbours. I could belt out a mean Loretta Lynn song or pretend I was a female Johnny Cash. My parents were big influences as they always listened to country music and still do. Gotta love some Conway Twitty. When I got way older (like 10) and seen Blondie perform on American Bandstand I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. I wanted to be her. I was obsessed. Never seen anything like her. A beautiful girl being a kick ass rock star!  Fricking amazing. Then it was Pat Benetar. Years later, Madonna. I know, dream big if you’re gonna dream.

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My parents never completely discouraged me, in fact when we eventually moved to a larger town (one with a traffic light) they bought me a guitar and hired a vocal coach but that’s about it as far as the resources being available at that time. There was no social media then, no information to guide us, dead ends.  That and the fact I was constantly conflicted by what I truly felt I wanted to do and what I felt I was expected to do with my life.  Could’ve been all in my own mind. Who knows? I’m like a walking mix of contradiction, worried about what people think of me one minute then not give a damn the next.  Hate raisins, but like them in bran muffins. Things like that. Messed up.  Plus I’m one of those type A Virgo types.  I completely annoy myself at times. Always searching and needing answers to things, creating more questions for myself, never ends. Where the hell is the off button? Spent most of my life being a big time people pleaser. Trust me, I’m a work in progress. Getting better now and learning to just say ‘Hell No!’ when the situation requires. God I love Oprah and her advice…     image

Good book btw.

It’s just a matter of life circumstances and things happening the way they’re supposed to. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.  I guess if I had truly wanted to attain that dream of being a singer/entertainer I would’ve packed up and moved to Nashville or Hollywood. Instead, at 18 years old I met my now ex husband and got married at 20 and had kids. (very small town mentality) Choices. It’s all about choices. I always knew I wanted kids so that was never a hesitation or a hard choice for me to make. That was probably the one and only thing in my life I knew I wanted. Oddly enough I never even liked kids (other peoples kids) but always knew I wanted my own. Again, major contradiction.  However, having children so young (kids having kids) does make it more challenging to accomplish certain things. Not impossible, just more of a challenge. I love the comic Louis C.K. he’s brilliantly funny and he jokes that having kids ruins your life and crushes your dreams. Now I tell my kids that. He has a point. Maybe I should just blame my kids? image

Even after I was married, had our son at 22 and was going to college at night, I still had that desire to be close/involved in music. By then we had moved out here to the west coast (Vancouver). I found a vocal coach and worked with her for a couple of years. I still had some hope in the back of my mind that maybe, just maybe one day I will do something with it.  Don’t ask me what? It just made me feel better. See, always a contradiction mixed in with the that damn people pleaser disease… another fine example: Going to college for Marketing & Business = what people expected of me vs. vocal lessons = what I wanted. Life has a way of moving along, things change, situations arise and you are left to hang on and make the best of it. Excuses, excuses, excuses. I sometimes think I’ve done too much making excuses in the past. I’m also working on that. It’s on my list. Long damn list.

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I’m over the could’ve, should’ve, would’ve been a singer/entertainer days but I’m still searching for that fulfillment. I have at least figured out through out the years that I need creativity in some form or another. And even though blogging is new, I feel a great sense of satisfaction already. There is so much more to come for our blog! Finding complete fulfillment is a work in progress, but isn’t that true of everyone at least to some degree?  Isn’t that what this journey is all about? Discovering?  Growing? Finding our true purpose? Seeking what truly fulfills us?  I can’t be the only one who feels this way. Can I? So many questions Laura!

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I believe once you get on the right track, listen to your instincts, you will eventually get to your personal destination. Whatever form that may be for you. For some (uh, yes, myself) that road has a little more hills, twists and turns. Thing is to keep going, learn a lesson or million two and keep following that road to your own personal version of destiny. What are your dreams? Your desires? Are you living your soul’s purpose?

Laura xo

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5 thoughts on “What Is Your Soul’s Purpose?

  1. Two things out of the bat, gotta love Johnny Cash, and I´m a Virgo too!
    Maybe if you moved out to Nashville you wouldn´t have kids, as you said you´re full of contradictions so maybe you would said `kids get in the way of my singing career´, and maybe just maybe that job of being a mom and at such a young age is something to admire.
    Stay frosty cool mamma,

  2. Hi Laura,

    This is such a wonderful post! Personally, I can absolutely 1000% relate to where you’re coming from. Or at least I USED to relate to where you’re coming from.

    What changed that for me was knowing about who I am at SOUL-LEVEL. Discovering what my Soul gifts are really helped me understand what sort of experiences would bring me the most fulfillment. And it also helped me realize WHY I can’t stick to one darn activity and be happy!

    But you hit the nail right on the head, SIster! You stated that going to school for marketing is what others want for you, while what you truly desire for yourself is to take vocal lessons.
    It’s wonderful that you’re able to tell the distinction — question is: Will you continue to move on inspiration when your Soul sends it your way???

    And because you sound like you’re a bit more ‘consciously aware’ than most, you have a responsibility, so to speak. Your Soul’s desire will only get stronger and louder until it is fulfilled!! So move on inspiration, honey and continue to take those voice lessons. Or heck, move onto the next activity or hobby. Whatever will make you happy is what is going to be best in the long run.

    If you’d like more information on accessing information about who you are at Soul-level try doing a search on akashic records or visit my site.

    I wish you all the happiness in the world because we all deserve to happy and fulfilled 😀

    In love,
    Jessica

    • Hi Jessica
      Thank you so very much for your comment. I apologize for the delayed response. I wanted to have a chance to browse through your site.
      Which by the way I did and I am enjoying it very much!
      I was so excited to read what you have written regarding our Soul’s Purpose. It’s not something that is easily discussed with some people. Certain people just don’t get it.
      I on the other hand could talk about it all day long. It is an amazing feeling when you start to understand and have that feeling you are heading in the right direction. That you are at least on the right track to fulfilling your true purpose.
      Like Oprah says, follow your true desires, block all of that static noise in your mind from outside sources that tell you otherwise. The negativity from others that try to make you feel you are not capable or worthy of achieving your biggest dreams. Once you get on the right track you will know it and honestly nothing will be able to stop you from succeeding.
      I appreciate your comment so much and I will continue to follow your blog!
      Sincerely,
      Laura

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